Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
There's a naked man in my car right now.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
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