My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
