Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize