apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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