It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
