Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
Randomize
