Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Going on a first date tonight...pros: my boobs look amazing. Cons: my abortion isn't until next week.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Randomize