remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Sorry about my life...
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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