i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Randomize
