hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
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