buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
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He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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