Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
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