How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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