Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Randomize
