Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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