I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
