just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
Randomize
