I got chris browned last night
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
