People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
