don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
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