I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
I love having hate sex.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
