Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
The air taste purple.
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