I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
You did what with his pubic hair?
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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