my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize