You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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