I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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