I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Randomize