$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Duck Duck Cougar?
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize