oh god the rape fog is back!
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Randomize
