one might say we're banned from that church
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
