do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
Randomize
