who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
