arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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