it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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