Kiss
Puke
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
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