i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
This house was built for laser tag.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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