i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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