stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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