Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
