All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
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