So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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