ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
