porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just watched in amazement as you had a full conversation about water temperature and bacteria with your pet goldfish.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
