Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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