dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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