So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
