i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
My butt remains clenched, sir.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
