he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
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