I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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