I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
