Ambien. No doubt about it.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Randomize
